A Brief Understanding of the Gift-Giving Love Language
Out of the five primary love languages, there’s one that many people misunderstand. Here’s a brief understanding of the gift-giving love language.
We all express affection in different ways. According to Gary Chapman, author of The 5 Love Languages, there are five primary ways that people give and receive love: acts of service, giving and receiving gifts like physical touch, quality time, and words of affirmation. Out of these five love languages, there’s one poor, misunderstood soul that tends to get a lot of flak: the language of gift-giving. When someone’s love language is gift-giving, people jump to the conclusion that they’re materialistic or that the way to their heart is through their wallet. These uninformed assumptions can cause people to avoid or rethink relationships, whether platonic or romantic, with those who have this love language.
The only thing I have to stay on the matter is this: These people are missing out on a lot. As someone whose best friend has this love language, I can attest that they’re far from materialistic—in fact, they’re some of the most thoughtful, sensitive people when it comes to family, friends, and love. Even better, they understand the true importance of giving gifts and will appreciate the things you buy or make for them more than anyone else. Feel like learning more about this unique, misunderstood language? This simple guide will help y’all gather a brief understanding of the gift-giving love language.
The Intention Matters More Than the Gift
It’s less about the gift and more about the thought behind it. When someone has gift-giving as their love language, they focus on the many, many ways that presents can communicate emotional love. In their minds, a gift should never be a placeholder for love or a way to discreetly smooth over arguments and disagreements. A gift should be thoughtful and come with pure intentions. Let’s say your partner recently broke their favorite pen. When you’re out at the store, you see the perfect replacement. Remembering them and caring about their plight, you buy the pen for them. That’s a prime example of a gift communicating emotional love. You bought the gift because you cared about your partner and knew that buying them a new pen could make them happy. Since it’s the sentiment that matters, y’all don’t need to invest in frivolous, expensive gifts to keep a gift-lover satisfied. When you have the right motives, a replacement pen or an inexpensive piece of jewelry can mean a lot.
They Love Surprises
Buying presents for occasions like birthdays and holidays is important. In most cases, it’s also obligatory. For people whose love language is gift-giving, it’s the intent that matters, which makes non-obligatory gift-giving speak volumes. Since they appreciate the attentiveness, surprises are an effective way of getting your message across. By tuning in to what they value, taking notice of what makes their face light up, and listening to their needs, you’ll find out what they like—and what the best way to surprise them is. For example, if you can see that they are getting more and more excited about football season starting up again, now might be the time to check out the geelong cats shop, or whoever their team is, and get them something ready to watch the games in style!
Timing Is Everything
To get a brief understanding of the gift-giving love language, y’all need to know what things matter—and timing is one of them. If someone has the love language of gift-giving, they love gifts. There’s no doubt about it! But when it comes to timing, you should always tread lightly. Purchasing big, expensive presents has one meaning when you’ve been dating for years and another, less positive meaning when you’ve only known each other for three weeks. In the former scenario, they’d probably see your gift as a thoughtful gesture. In the latter, they might greet it with suspicion, seeing it as a bribe, an apology for some non-existent wrongdoing, or something else. It’s important to communicate where you stand in the relationship before you start showering them with gifts. If they’re hesitating to accept something you’ve bought them, they might not be as far (emotionally) into the relationship as you are.
