The other day, I told you about my painful childhood memory of being called ugly and having rocks thrown at me when I walked around the neighborhood. I told you that those memories have stayed with me and still haunt me to this day. But did you know that sometimes the way we see ourselves and the way other people see us don’t always add up? I decided to see if 4 of my closest friends saw me the same way that I saw myself. I asked them to write 2-3 sentences about me to see if the way I see myself and the version they see are the same. Boy, was I shocked to find out that the version that I saw – someone not worthy of love or admiration was totally different from the version they saw. Just read what they wrote.
Cindi- Who I consider my mentor and someone I aspire to be when I grow up said this.
“Melissa is someone who is always thinking of others. She seeks joy and shares the joy she finds with whom she can. Melissa is a selfless daughter, wife, mother, and friend. Her smile is contagious! And she loves life like she loves her family and friends – wholehearted!”
You see that when she said that about my smile, I am like wow as this is one thing that I totally don’t like about myself.
Beverly- Who I consider my spiritual Mentor and has a faith that I strive for said this.
“Melissa is a talented, creative writer. She has a gift in repurposing anything & everything from scratched, dented furniture to used paper towel rolls & making the item absolutely beautiful. In that same way when I was searching for my calling in who God wanted me to be, Melissa saw the beautiful person I could be. She encouraged me to use my gift of writing, she poured into me & she cheered me on! Some call her artist, author, columnist, or designer, but I have the pleasure of calling her my friend. I am so grateful for her gifting to see the good in everything & everyone.”
You see I didn’t think I could be an encouragement to anyone and knowing that I encouraged her was like a wow moment for me. This is a person who speaks eloquently and who has even written a book that I reviewed a while back.
Courtney- Who has probably known me the longest as our girls have been friends since they were in Kindergarten had this to say.
“Melissa is hard to describe in 2-3 sentences but I’ll give it a shot! She is an amazing mother and a great friend. Her Passion, creativity, and drive is unstoppable when it comes to her work. She is kind, a great listener and always there when you need her.”
I so don’t see myself like that I totally consider myself lazy when it comes to work. And I don’t always feel like I have been there for my friends. But wow, from someone I admire for her drive that is totally awesome.
Laura- Who is probably the one I have known the shortest amount of time, but knowing her the shortest amount of time doesn’t mean anything. I feel such a kinship with her and she is one that got me to start running which I never thought I would do, had this to say.
A considerate, compassionate friend who wants, and is willing to help, her friends to be the best they can be. God-centered and family focused with a heart that sees through the smoke filter that others attempt to hide behind. Though she lacks self-confidence, when you get to know her, you realize that she is one of the greatest friends you could have because she’s of the rare few who will tenderly say what needs to be said instead of what you want to hear! And I am blessed to have her in my life!
Wow like I told you she knows me so well. She hit on the self-confidence issue with me but she unlike me can see past this and see the person inside.
So you see the way we see ourselves, is totally opposite of the way people see us. Inside I am blubbering blob of nerves and in my mind, I am saying what am I doing here, I don’t belong with these people who are so successful but the way people see me is that I do belong. So here is what I want you to do. I want you to ask a few of your closest friends to describe you in two or three sentences and then compare it to how you see yourself. I will bet you that the way you look at yourself and the way others see you will be totally different.